Many people who I know and even more that I don't know have e-mailed me during this time with Sophie. The e-mails have been so precious and have encouraged me more than you know. I find it truly amazing that so many people have been touched by my daughter. Knowing her little life is having eternal impact, is so encouraging. I have to say, I am humbled by your words about my strength in this circumstance. It seems so strange the read this, because I know that I am not a strong person. Only God has gotten me this far. Trust me, it is NOT of me. Sometimes, I catch myself looking at myself in the mirror and thinking, "Who is this person?". The Aimee I know should be curled up in a ball somewhere, throwing a fit, screaming about how unfair this is. I admit, the thought has crossed my mind, many times. But, during these dark moments, I feel Christ's presence and know that He is holding my hand and carrying me. Some of my closest times with Christ have been during this time of trial. These past few weeks, I have had to cling tighter to Christ than ever before. My mind wants to wander and fear can take hold easily. I am struggling right now with all the "what ifs". I like to have things in order and have a plan, but I have zero control of this situation! I have to remind myself of God's complete sovereignty over this situation. Please pray for us this week that fear would not take hold. We have our next Dr. appt. next Tuesday. This is just a regular check-up. We will also be meeting with the nursing staff at the hospital next week. We pray that God would send the right nurses to us.
The Lord was so sweet to me yesterday. For the past 3 months, I have been praying for snow. (Yeah, I know, its crazy to pray for that in Alabama!) I have been driving Carlton nuts about taking the kids to see some snow this year. So, two days ago we watched the weather forecast and saw that north Alabama/north Georgia was going to possibly get some snow this weekend. We decided we were going to get in the van after church on Sunday and drive until we found snow. Yesterday, from out of nowhere, (not even James Spann predicted this), snow began to fall and it didn't stop for 3 hours. I have never, ever seen snowflakes like this in Alabama. I ran upstairs and got Noah up from his nap (you have to understand how excited I was....Noah's nap time is precious time to me, its called "peace and quiet time"). I was so excited, I sent them outside without coats, then I realized it wasn't going to stop, so I bundled them up and they spent the next 3 hours enjoying our sweet gift from above! I couldn't help but smile and think that this was snow was sent just for me.
From Beside Still Waters, Charles Spurgeon
" This is how to deal with God. Praise Him before you are delivered. Praise Him for what is coming. Adore Him for what He is going to do. I do not think there is a sweeter song in God's ear than the song of one who blessess Him for grace that has not yet been tasted, who blesses Him for answers that have not been recieved but are sure to come."
17 Though the fig tree does not bud and there are no grapes on the vines, though the olive crop fails and the fields produce no food, though there are no sheep in the pen and no cattle in the stalls,
18 Yet I will rejoice in the LORD, I will be joyful in God my Savior.
19 The Sovereign LORD is my strength; he makes my feet like the feet of a deer, he enables me to go on the heights.